Be:Do:Have

Lets PlaY

2009-03-13T09:57:00.001-07:00

Where to begin?

This month has been a rollercoaster! On top of wild, new promise to you to have one song a month and three video blogs a week -- I had to move (still in LA ;), shot a music video for “Shame’s a Bitter Game”, learned Reiki, and I’ve had acting and finance classes 5-6 nights a week.

At least life is never boring!

In 2009 I wanted to do something really special, so I created Polyamorous: A collection of works by yours truly, Tiff. It’s a collection of songs, videos, and artwork that I will be releasing monthly online for all of 2009 that explores the world of love, sex and romance.

My Goals:

To give you new creations that will inspire you every month
To explore love, sex, and romance. ;)
To get over my need for “perfect” art and just let go and trust in my growth as an artist and trust in your love. After all, who are we to judge what gets created through us? Seems arrogant doesn’t it?
To let down my guard and allow myself to open up to you. To be vulnerable, intimate and fully, unabashedly self-expressed. (My greatest fear is to make myself completely vulnerable and have my heart ripped apart. But I am giving that up this year and giving it all to you in baby steps every month;).
To play with you. I have been hoarding all my music and you all have been very patient. You have emailed and called and chastised. Thank you for kicking my ass. I’m ready to play ;)
SO, I have a request of you…

PLAY WITH ME!

Give me feedback on songs, videoblogs, music videos, artwork, blogs and newsletters! I want to know what is working and what’s not. What do you love? What do you want more of? What don’t you like? Please Tell Me! And Let’s PLAY TOGETHER!!! It would make a huge difference if you gave your feedback by posting it on my blog or on Facebook or Myspace, instead of emailing me directly. This is more fun b/c we can all share our thoughts together! Will you take this on? Please let me know. I love you madly.

The first piece of feedback you can give is on “Shame’s a Bitter Game” and the first batch of videoblogs.

Comment Below and bare your soul ;)

On the videoblogs: Truth is, I have no idea where they are leading yet ;) I am proud however that I am least busting my ass to do them. The hardest step is always getting out the door. Once you’re out its all about exploring and finding the right direction.

STAY TUNED: Next week I release the MARCH “SONG OF THE MONTH” for your listening pleasure.

FreedomLovePlaY.

Tiff

freedomloveplay.com
tiffrandol.com

FORWARD TO A FRIEND:
http://ping.fm/GVxGv

add me on twitter.com/tiffanyrandol
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"Keep your mind ever on the Star, but let your eyes watch over your footsteps, lest you fall into the mire by reason of your upward gaze." - The Kybalion

Joshua Bell at Washington DC Metro Station

2009-03-10T10:45:00.001-07:00

Washington DC Metro Station on a cold January morning in 2007. He played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time approx 2 thousand people went through the station, most of them on their way to work. After 3 mins a middle aged man noticed there was a musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds and then hurried to meet his schedule.

4 mins later the violinist received his first dollar: a woman threw the money in the till and, without stopping, continued to walk.

6 minutes, a young man leaned against the wall to listen to him, then looked at his watch and started to walk again.

10 mins: a 3 year old boy stopped but his mother tugged him along hurriedly, as the kid stopped to look at the violinist. Finally the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk, turning his head all the time. This action was repeated by several other children. Every parent, without exception, forced them to move on.

45 minutes; the musician played. Only 6 people stopped and stayed for a while. About 20 gave him money but continued to walk their normal pace.
He collected $32.

1 hour; he finished playing and silence took over. No one noticed. No one applauded, nor was there any recognition.

No one knew this but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the best musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written, with a violin worth $3.5 million dollars. Two days before Joshua Bell sold out a theater in Boston where the seats averaged $100.

This is a real story. Joshua Bell playing incognito in the metro station was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste and people's priorities. The questions raised: in a common place environment at an inappropriate hour, do we perceive beauty? Do we stop to appreciate it? Do we recognize talent in an unexpected context?

One possible conclusion reached from this experiment could be:

If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world playing some of the finest music ever written, with one of the most beautiful instruments .... how many other things are we missing?

love audrey hepburn

2009-02-24T00:47:00.001-08:00

"Audrey Hepburn" from Tiff Randol on Vimeo.

Todd Rundgren says, “music is a service, not a product”

2009-01-31T03:08:00.001-08:00

Highlighting the flaws of the music industry, musician and computer programmer Todd Rundgren says, “music is a service, not a product” and should be marketed accordingly.

watch this video. very interesting
http://ping.fm/Dxv3d

bra's on fire

2008-12-29T21:22:00.001-08:00

last night i lit my bras on fire. no - not a throwback to the 60's, but a brilliant placement next to some candles. lol. ;)

thankfully we stopped the fire, unfortunately my brand new calvin's were burnt thru. somehow i used my magic persuasion to get me 50% off to get new ones though! the ladies at bonton were very sympathetic to my situation ;)

Holiday Love - Pay it Forward

2008-12-23T11:18:00.001-08:00

Happy Hanukkha Happy Quanza Merry Christmas! ;) I wanted to do something special for everyone this year, so I wrote a xmas song and recorded it live a couple nights ago. It's my gift to you. You can pass this link around to all your friends and family and ANYONE can download this song for free! 2008 has been a very special year - a lot of major changes have happened this year. Thank you for all your love and support - looking forward to all that 2009 will bring!

Thinking of You On Christmas Day (Live)
Song and Music by Tiff Randol

GIVE THE GIFT OF ACKNOWLEDGMENT.
As you pass this around to your loved ones, I invite you to play a special game with me. Acknowledge 5 people for who they have been for you and the brilliant future that you see them stepping into. Our words are very powerful and we have the ability to inspire people to become bigger than they know themselves to be. There is no greater gift than acknowledgment.

If you love this song and would like to make a gift contribution you can do so by clicking below. $2, $5, $25, etc - any amount you contribute will go towards recording a collection of new songs to be released in 2009. The first song will be released for Valentine's Day and each month you'll get a new song for all of 2009, creating a collection of songs that you are very much a part of. I'll share more about this after the holidays. Thank you for playing with me and being a part of this!

With Love,
Tiff Randol

freedomloveplay.com
tiffrandol.com

mr.berg

2008-12-16T02:41:00.001-08:00

one of my dearest friends, brett below.. i had to post this photo. he makes me laugh. this picture is priceless.

Be afraid and act anyway.

2008-12-09T22:03:00.001-08:00

fall into winter is an interesting time of year. my mood always seems to change with the weather. this week its been moody and a little gray, but calm.

I’ve been in the mode of assessing what I’ve done, where I am, what I’m doing next. Each year its the same cycle. Fall is when I look around at everything; Winter I become reclusive and creative. I write, read, paint, and stare at the snow and stars.

This is the first time I’m away from the east coast and single; you think I’d be feeling lonely, but I am exhilarated. I feel like I am on the edge of something extraordinary and terrifying. I let go of a lot this year and feel like I jumped off a cliff. Life is uncertain and nothing what it seems, but I’m clear that life isn’t worth living without risks. They say that bravery is being afraid and acting anyway. I love that. If we are too afraid to follow our passion, something inside us is dead. Passion is what makes us alive gives us freedom. My resolution for the rest of the year is to be passionate about everything I do and do nothing I feel dispassionate about.

Thanksgiving in LA

2008-11-28T03:14:00.001-08:00

what an interesting holiday i've had.. anita and i had dinner with a group of lovely strangers and then off to party hopping we went. first we ended up in the home of a composer where i got to play with a gorgeous boa constrictor. I am so in love with her.. ;)

Then we ended up at Adam Shankman's mansion in the hollywood hills where i found myself in a pool with a bunch of naked strangers.

Yes - interesting holiday indeed. Was fun AND i absolutely missed my crazy wonderful family, my dad's gravy and mom's stuffing. Regardless, it was a great day. I am thankful for all the new, wonderful people I met and for my family and friends. xo tiff

A week of birthday

2008-11-12T00:53:00.001-08:00

This week was amazing. I celebrated my birthday on multiple occasions and will continue to milk it until it gets closer to thanksgiving, where i will start celebrating food and beer!

Thursday was Hotel Cafe. My friends are adorable and baked cupcakes. Anita, my godmother flooded the place with balloons. The show was great - it was so nice to play with a full band in LA. It’s a rare occasion that makes me oh so happy! Late night we went to the piano bar where Brother Sal serenaded me with the best birthday song ever - you guessed it: Journey

Sunday was my real bday and I went out with a bunch of girls for dinner and then they took me to Louis IV and Bar Marmont in Hollywood. Was a fun night. Monday I saw Beck at the Nokia in LA. He was incredible. They performed his new single with headphones and samplers. It was so cute… Plus I love redheads! The opening band Jay Reatard I was not a fan of. The first half i thought they completely rocked, but after 5 or 6 songs with the same volume and tempo - loud and fast - I got super bored.

In Other News: We have been waiting and waiting and waiting for the unveiling of the new website. It’s official. While we will go on tweaking forever, TiffRandol.com is up and running, along with a new blog site that I am smitten with. It has taken a tremendous amount of effort from a group of incredible people. Special thanks to LANFUSION(.com) and Steve Spalding (http://ping.fm/XgJAZ) for their generosity and brilliance in pulling this together! Thank you! Tell me what you think - I love hearing from you. Post comments here or on myspace and facebook!

Next piece of big news: We finished mixing the album and now on to mastering! It sounds fantastic with thanks to Andrew Schneider and Todd Perlmutter for lending me their very large ears. ;) I’d also like to give special thanks to a few people who contributed towards the record. Thank you - without your support it would not have been possible! We still have a ways to go and I need your help. What I am creating is that we get 1000 downloads of the EP at $5 and the new record is as good as mixed!

How you can help:
1. Download Kiss Me Kiss Me direct off the site for $5
2. Help me start a viral campaign by emailing at least 10 friends and asking them to email 10 of their friends. Let them know: I am raising money to finish my record and the goal is to have 1000 people download the EP. Share with them why you think they should download it. And let them know that EVERY download makes a huge difference. Ask them if they will show their support by downloading it NOW by clicking here: (link to the direct download) and forward it to 10 friends.
3. OR you can order CD’s as holiday gifts from CDBABY- a charming, unique, inspiring stocking stuffer for someone you love. Order it here: http://ping.fm/lzwRA

Thank you!! It’s been an inspiring month. I am madly in love with music and everyone I know. Life is good and all i have to do is remember to take a deep breath every once in a while and watch the sunset.

Love,
Tiff

election

2008-11-04T18:58:00.001-08:00

this is pretty damn exciting. numbers numbers numbers...

thank god i had an absentee ballot ;) Yay PA!!! with flying colors

Vote NO on Proposition 8

2008-10-22T06:23:00.001-07:00

I need to ask for your help. There is an unfair ballot proposition that, if passed, will take away fundamental rights. This is really important to me. Will you help me defeat Prop. 8?

Prop. 8 would eliminate the right to marry for same-sex couples. I trust you agree that eliminating fundamental rights - from anyone - is unnecessary and a step backwards in our evolution.

I hope you are already planning to vote NO. But just in case you're unsure, I want you to know the real deal.

Virtually every major paper in California is against Prop 8. The L.A. Times says it is "a drastic step to strip people of rights." La Opinión called Prop 8 "an unnecessary initiative". The San Diego Union Tribune wrote that Prop 8 "offends many Californians' sense of fairness."

If that doesn't convince you, I hope you'll email me so we can talk about this.

If you plan to vote NO, there are a few easy things to help ensure it is defeated.

1. Tell everyone you know to vote NO. Send them a message at http://ping.fm/wArSQ It is really easy!
2. Make a donation. The other side has raised over $10 million more than us. They are using their war chest to spread lies and misinformation. Your donation will help us reach undecided voters who need to hear that Prop. 8 is wrong and unfair. http://ping.fm/eQWKl
3. Volunteer your time. Sign up to call undecided voters or help out in field offices across the state. http://ping.fm/29pjd

Thank you for doing all you can to defeat Prop. 8.
Tiff Randol

Lemon By Bono

2008-10-22T06:04:00.001-07:00

How great are these lyrics? I'm obsessed with lemons...

Lemon
by Bono

See through in the sunlight
She wore lemon
But never in the daylight
She's gonna make you cry
She's gonna make you whisper and moan
And when you're dry
She draws her water from the stone

And I feel
Like I'm slowly, slowly, slowly slipping under
And I feel
Like I'm holding onto nothing

She wore lemon
To colour in the cold grey night
She had heaven
And she held on so tight

A man makes a picture
A moving picture
Through the light projected
He can see himself up close
A man captures colour
A man likes to stare
He turns his money into light to look for her

And I feel
Like I'm drifting, drifting, drifting from the shore
And I feel
Like I'm swimming out to her

Midnight is where the day begins
Midnight is where the day begins
Midnight is where the day begins

Lemon
See through in the sunlight

A man builds a city
With banks and cathedrals
A man melts the sand so he can
See the world outside You're gonna meet her there
A man makes a car She's your destination
And builds roads to run them on You gotta get to her
A man dreams of leaving She's imagination
But he always stays behind

And these are the days
When our work has come assunder
And these are the days
When we look for something other

Midnight is where the day begins

Rehobeth Beach Family

2008-10-19T07:40:00.001-07:00

I flew into Newark Thursday night, went to NY Fri morning, hopped a train to PA Fri night and drove to Rehobeth Beach on Saturday. Now I'm back in Pa ;) a mouthful.

Rehobeth Beach was so beautiful and the ocean was incredible - rough and a little stormy. It's been a while since i've been to Delaware - two years in fact since Valeze played Dewey Beach.

One of the things I love most about being a musician is the people you meet in your travels. Years ago Valeze played with a band called The Metrosexuals. We got on great, ended up playing a bunch of dates together, and have stayed friends since. We haven't seen each other since we last played about 2 years ago, but they were all there last night - Derek, Marty, Chris, Jeremy.. I was so moved.. It's like family in a way. You meet people on the road and fall in love with them and you know when you meet them that you won't see them often, but when you do its like you never left.

Drama

2008-10-13T19:01:00.001-07:00

"This whole world is just like a drama, so don't take it too seriously. Seriousness will force you into trouble... Look backwards, look forwards, look to all dimensions at what you are, what your life is. It looks like a long dream, and everything that you take so
seriously this moment becomes irrelevant the next moment. You may not even remember it. Remember your first love, how serious it was. Life depended on it. Now you don't remember it at all, it is forgotten.

And whatever you are thinking that your life
depends on today will eventually be forgotten. If you are unhappy, you have taken something too seriously. Don't try to find a way to be happy. Just change your attitude. You cannot be happy with a serious mind. With a festive mind, you can be happy.
Take this whole life as a myth, as a story. It is, and once you take it this way you will not be unhappy"
-OSHO

Campaign Links

2008-10-09T13:56:00.001-07:00

1. That is hilarious:
http://ping.fm/EADcx

2. That is quite fascinating:
http://ping.fm/qb6ZI

Dr. Woo

2008-10-08T15:25:00.001-07:00

After 3 weeks of being incredibly sick, my friends told me to go see this chinese doctor - Dr. Woo. I drove to Chinatown, which by the way is so much cleaner and cuter than Chinatown in NY.. I love it..

I went into this little herbal shop where Dr. Woo checked my tongue, my pulse and after about 5 minutes told me that I have cysts in my stomach and my kidney is out of balance. He said I have crazy amounts of internal radiation that's causing all of it. Plus my stomach and immune system are messed up b/c i used to eat horrible food. interesting....... my old diet consisted of pasta, thai food, beer and illegal supplements. ;) i suppose i'm paying. So now I'm taking shitloads of supplements. No alcohol, no spicy food... Good god... The only vices I have left taken from me! ;(

So - I will let you know how progress goes. I'm kind of wondering if this internal radiation is due to my recent experiment with cellibacy ;) Seriously though - could be lots of internal energy that doesn't know what to do with itself. I am a Scorpio after all...

Matters of the heart

2008-09-26T20:41:00.001-07:00

my love life has been nothing short of complicated in recent years and I think it would take too much time to explain ;) so I avoid... one day you will get the full story and you will be highly fascinated by my tales of open relationships and love and sex sagas that might as well be straight out of the most fabulously cliché history books.

why am i thinking about this? b/c I just drank a big glass of red wine and am listening to mikki james "the fall". which throws me right into an all too familiar state of being lonely – which think i am quite addicted to... a strange thing. I suppose I have to be addicted to something ;)

life has been interesting lately. Its strange going from being a serial relationshipist to being single. But its refreshing. I am getting to know myself in ways that I never have. There’s no one out there to distract me from myself, from you, from my vision. I think I have always used sex and relationships as a way to distract me, so for me this is a big step.

Ok. Now that I have bared my intimate life with you, I am off to have more red wine and sweet dreams.

Presidential Debate

2008-09-26T20:03:00.001-07:00

Obama is completely present and genuine. He answers with a level of clarity and authenticity that is so refreshing. I love that he is interested in spending on education and things that will cause our country and the people to thrive. He clearly is committed to building our country and creating wealth for Americans as a whole. To me, McCain is just more of the same old same old.

Obviously, we cannot afford more of the same. I'm interested in a new conversation... Young, present, and committed. You?

Oh Cassettes

2008-09-17T13:52:00.001-07:00

So a friend of mine found a cassette tape of my songs in a Goodwill Store in Dunlap, TN... population of 200 people. how odd. i'm cracking up. part of me is a little afraid that its one of my early childhood creations... I used to rewrite dirty lyrics to disney songs and release albums for christmas to my family... could they be resurfacing? oh my...

last night i played silverlake lounge. was such a fun night. my friend jessy greene sat in on violin - she's amazing and gorgeous. also ben peeler of course, who is always brilliant. the highlight of the night for me was having mikki james play. despite his self deprecating comments about being uncomfortable on stage, i think he is a brilliant songwriter and i love hearing him play.

oh other highlight of the night was meeting richard grieco. psyched ;)

Gospel Night at Hotel Cafe

2008-09-08T02:07:00.001-07:00

Just got home from Brother Sal and Laura Jansen's "Gospel Night" at Hotel Cafe. The show was beyond amazing - completely inspiring and brought me back to my days at church camp. Fun Fact for the Day: If you didn't know, I used to lead campfires at church camp and my parents used to be ministers. ;) It was one of my biggest experiences growing up…

So after the show, I pull into the driveway with my friend Aida and share with her about it. I had to walk away b/c I didn't believe in organized religion anymore and the boundaries and separation I feel it creates between people. At this point I don't identify with anything that creates any kind of separation – labels, religions, sometimes even gender ;) Really – we're all the same, except when we say we're not. And even then, we still are – we just forgot we are.

I had no idea this was all brewing under the surface and I certainly had no idea I would be tearing up in my driveway or writing an extremely personal blog after "Gospel Night" at Hotel. But there it was and I surely did and I feel like I can finally put it to rest and enjoy these songs again with absolute freedom. Yes, I will be singing with em at the next Gospel Night and fillllled with anticipation. ;)

Night,
Tiff

Love Is... Osho

2008-08-31T10:04:00.001-07:00

"Love is not an exploitation but a mutual sharing of your being, of your joys, of your music, of your pure poetry of life. It is sharing and it is mutual". - Osho (from "Love Freedom and Aloneness")

This book is possibly my favorite book on the planet. Whenever I find myself getting a little possessive of people in my life I jump up and read this book.

OK signing off. Just wanted to share that quote real quick. Order the book on amazon and tell me what you think. Going to enjoy some sunshine, drink tea and read more of my man Osho! xot

Passing

2008-08-14T10:09:00.001-07:00

I just found out that a girl I know passed away two days ago in her sleep while on vacation with her family. She was 29, successful and absolutely stunning. We don't know yet why she died, but I suppose it doesn't really matter - just like that, for no reason at all, she passed and that's how it goes. I have knots in my stomach. I remember nothing but lovely things about her and it just seems so tragic.

I spoke with another friend of mine who was very close to her and he said "I remember all those times we stressed about exams and the right college and the right law school. I regret that. I wish those moments were spent having fun and enjoying life." We never know when our last moment will be and we waste so much time worrying about the future and forget to enjoy each moment we are alive until its too late.

"Waste not, want not".

Don't seek the truth, cease to cherish opinions

2008-08-01T08:55:00.001-07:00

My friend Pesci asked me yesterday if i consider myself enlightened. We were joking around, but I thought about it this morning as I was walking down the street to order my latest addiction (decaf, non-fat venti latte;) lol. So...What I concluded is that I am more so than I was yesterday and enlightened enough to know that I don't know my ass from a hole in the ground.

We are very funny, human beings... We so love to define and label ourselves, even when we're being rebellious and "anti" something, we think we're doing the opposite of labeling and we're actually just labeling ourselves "opposite of that". It's so silly and what's the point really? You label yourself and every one else that meets you labels you. Every single one is an opinion and they are all different ones because every point of view is slightly different. We are simply a bunch of crazy people trying to define the undefinable. Trying to explain and understand the unexplainable. Let it go.

A Zen saying - "Don't seek the truth, cease to cherish opinions."

We waste so much time

2008-07-11T07:02:00.000-07:00

pretending. worrying. thinking. numbing ourselves. paralyzed from living.

its time to wake up. its time to move forward. its time to live.

Home Sweet NY

2008-07-10T07:18:00.000-07:00

It's been wonderful being in NY. It has been extremely hectic - i thought I'd have plenty of free time in 3 weeks to chill, but 3 gigs has turned into 5 gigs, plus a live taping with Woozfly, recording some commercials, and the kicker - recording at the gorgeous LoHo Studios with Todd Perlmutter from Blue Man Group. I'm very excited.. On top of that we got photos back from the shoot last week and they are so cool... Now we're working on redesigning the website and album and all that. Finally came up with a title for the album too. its a secret ;) you'll see..

So.. NY... There is something about coming home to NY that feels so magical. There is so much love in this city and this week being with everyone has been an amazing homecoming. I am even more excited to see everyone at Mercury Lounge on Tuesday. I know that's going to be an incredible night.

One of these days I will get this video blog process moving smoothly and I'll be able to keep a running a video tab up online ;) Still need someone to help edit.. anyone?

Anyway, love to all. gotta catch a train. xx Tiff

devour your life

2008-06-11T15:55:00.000-07:00

almost two years ago i started this blog to share with you all a declaration of "who i am". i went through a life altering experience and realized what an asshole i had been to many people that i loved because it was more important for me to prove that i was right, than to accept a different point of view. how funny we are? we will even be righteous about how open minded we are! "you are wrong - we ARE open minded!" lol.

really its kind of cute - those are the moments where we get stuck in being 5 years old again. now when i get that way or someone i know does, i try to laugh and have compassion, knowing its just a childish reaction. this has three major impacts - 1. i feel way less stressed out and angry. 2. the other person gets heard and acknowledged - which is all they really wanted in the first place. 3. the conversation disappears. try it and you'll see... when you allow another to be heard and gotten, that conversation will literally disappear.

our world is a big game that looks like this: millions and millions of people running around bumping into one another trying to prove that their point of view is right. sometimes we prove it by finding others that agree. other times we prove it by finding people who disagree so we can be pissed and then go find others that agree. lol. silly? maybe.. fun? sometimes.. purposeful? you be the judge.. to me its just what it is and well - its pretty silly, but so is scrabble and i sure as hell love a good scrabble match.

so who i am i in this silly game? freedom, love and play. why? because it is my life and i get to say, as do you!! what i am committed to is to share my love with the world. to inspire you. to teach you. to learn from you. to honor who you are and acknowledge you. to be with you in your heart and soul wherever you are, causing you to look at love in a way you never have before. to have you know that you can create anything for yourself and your life and that true, authentic, unconditional love is the access point to everything you desire.

i invite you to begin to devour life. everything you desire is yours. there are NO limitations! stop suppressing your desires, your life, your adventure. live, love, create, be self expressed. know that every moment of your life is a dance and you get to choose your next move. so who are you today?

with love,

tiff

freedom.love.play
www.tiffanyrandol.com

Channeling, San Diego, Sailing and Studio

2008-06-09T15:58:00.001-07:00

It has been a very interesting week... Last Tuesday I saw a lecture on raw food and enzyme therapy.. was pretty amazing. Then afterwards I sat in a room with 9 people, most of whom were strangers and a Channel or Medium did a session with us. It was one of the wildest experiences I've ever had. I am definitely a very open person - I believe in just about anything that you can't actually see with your own two eyes. Even so, there was that little skeptic in me, but this experience was beyond moving and fascinating. Riz, the Channel, is definitely the real deal. He said things to me and everyone in the room that he could not have known. The thing that moved me the most was that he knew I was a painter and told me to "drop the brushes, dip my hands and body in the paint and that I would feel as i once did as a child". It's been about two years since I've painted and I've missed it so much, but i've been so busy and focused on first, recording this album and now, raising money for it, building a team, and everything that goes into an album release across the board. In any case, I have missed painting. Now I just need to find some place to go paint for a day with my hands and body ;)

The rest of the week was amazing as well. Had some great meetings. Wrote a new song. Thursday I saw a great songwriter play named Buddy, which was wonderful. Saturday I went to San Diego with my friends Ross and Brennan for the day and drank tons of beer on the beach. Yes, I cheated on my diet in a major way ;) But it was microbrew.... I'm helpless with a good microbrew. lol. Sat night I played a show at the strangest venue i've ever been to. Sunday we drove back and I went sailing with a bunch of friends. What a beautiful day... I love the ocean.

Have to run - I'm on my way to Jim Scott's Studio to work on a remix of "Kiss Me Kiss Me"

xoxoox

MillionForMarriage

2008-05-29T15:58:00.000-07:00

I signed. Read this letter and sign if you will! xo Tiff

Dear Friend,

Do you want to live in a country that legalizes discrimination?
Despite the recent California Supreme Court decision that
denying same-sex couples the right to marry is unconstitutional,
efforts are underway throughout the country to take away rights
from same-sex couples.

I just joined thousands of others in showing my support for
marriage equality for all. But recently, proponents of bigotry
and hate collected even more signatures in an attempt to
invalidate the California Supreme Court decision. And they won't
stop with California - extremists are even trying to add a
same-sex marriage ban to the U.S. Constitution.

We are at a turning point in our nation's history and I'm hoping
you'll join me in standing up against discrimination. Please
sign the Million for Marriage petition and get us one name
closer to showing that Americans overwhelmingly support marriage
equality!

http://www.MillionForMarriage.org

Every committed couple deserves to enjoy the privileges and
responsibilities conferred by marriage. Add your name to the
petition and be a part of the movement to fight for marriage
equality for all.

Thank you!

Videoblog 3B: Ben Peeler and I in the studio

2008-05-25T15:59:00.000-07:00

This is a very serious blogisode. Ben wrote me a song. He is madly in love. ;) Come see Ben and I play at Genghis Cohen this Thursday 5/29 in LaLaLand. 9pm

BTW - If you have not seen my fabulous new haircut, here is a pic:

On Blogging

2008-05-22T16:00:00.000-07:00

It's a beautiful day as per usual in Cali, though yesterday was kind of stormy. I'm getting ready to run off to Santa Monica and Venice Beach for a couple meetings, but it hit me this morning that I missed writing to you all. When I don't write for a while I get so overwhelmed with the massive amount of things that have happened in my life that I don't even know where to start, so I avoid starting. (The mind is illogical most of the time - did you ever notice??) So then what happens is you have no idea what's going on and then at some point I write a long blog with an overwhelm of crap! ;)There's a fine line between updating and verbal diarrhea - I am still trying to find the balance ;) Funny b/c sometimes I listen to people talk and talk and think - goddamn... I really don't need all these details - when are they gonna get to the point? And then I go do the same thing... ;) lol. I suppose we are all a reflection of one another - in fact, I noticed lately that the things that bother me most about other people are really the things that bother me most about myself. For example - when people are late to meet me or don't return my phone calls. I get so pissed!!! and most of the people in my life will laugh b/c I am constantly late and sometimes I avoid returning phone calls if there's something I don't want to deal with. Yes, I am telling on myself. why? Because I know you'll call me out on it and I love you for that.

Addressing the area of blogging and videoblogging - call me out on it. email me and shout if you don't hear from me every week b/c probably what's going on is exactly what I mentioned above and inside I really want to share every intimate detail of my life (minus the crap part of it;)

As for the video blog bit - I so want to be doing this regularly, but am having tech issues! I am a songwriter - figuring out Imovie Editing is not my thing ;) If anyone would like to help out and be part of my video team - let me know.

Love you all. Running out the door. BUT I will update you later on my travels, where i'm at with the record release, my romance life, and more.

xo Tiff

Desires

2008-05-16T17:10:00.001-07:00

“To thine own self be true.” – Shakespeare

Explore and express your desires fully. Experience all of life so that you are satisfied and complete. When we suppress our desires, it poisons us. We become incapable of being true to ourselves and others.

The beauty and power in life is to not live unconciously based on our past, but to open up to a world of limitless possibilities.

PS... i am no longer updating this blog. Tune in at www.myspace.com/tiffanyrandol

Love tiff
--------------------

DOWNLOAD KISS ME KISS ME ON ITUNES!!!! SUPPORT INDEPENDENT MUSIC!!!

..

Go to www.TIFFANYRANDOL.com for information about KISS ME KISS ME, shows or to purchase artwork!

Help Tiff finish her album! Go to facebook to donate to her recording fund

Tiff Randol Live @ Mercury Lounge - "Stuck In His Way"

2008-05-09T16:01:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-DCy_h03O9I

Hey all - here is "Stuck In His Way" from the Mercury Lounge Show in March. you all did a fabulous job whistling.

xoox t

videoblog 2: Jim Scott’s Studio Check it out

2008-05-08T16:02:00.000-07:00

I went to visit "Plyers Studio" deep in the valley where the legendary Jim Scott and brilliant engineer Kevin Dean create gorgeous music! Jim has produced/mixed/engineered just about every classic artist from Sting to Stevie Nicks to Tom Petty. I had a blast at the studio playing with an overwhelm of toys ;)

Prince @ Coachella

2008-04-28T16:03:00.000-07:00

all i need to say is....................... nothing.....

he said it all when he said "i'm so funky i can't even sleep with myself"

and

prince is heaven. i've never felt so inspired and so inadequate all at once ;)

Pretty In Pink

2008-04-24T16:05:00.000-07:00

just watched it... god i love that movie. ;) i am madly in love with andrew mccarthy. can't help it. although i must say - the kiss at the end looks so painful... those two should have practiced that scene more...

homesick

2008-04-24T16:04:00.000-07:00

i miss my mum and dad and bro and sis and animals and friends in NY and my loves. this too shall pass ;) enjoy my first videoblog. lol. i need an imovie lesson! ox t

Mercury Lounge VIDEO!!!

2008-04-10T07:46:00.001-07:00

sitting at home sick, bored, and desperately needing to do something i learned how to use iMovie ;) For those of you that missed Piano's AND Mercury Lounge a couple weeks ago - here is a Live song from The Merc on 3/14. please comment, subscribe, etc. i am going to have some fun with video blogging. more to come. oxxo tiff

the walking dead

2008-04-08T15:50:00.000-07:00

i feel like the walking dead. i have been extremely sick for over two weeks now. i got that awful cold and its completely gotten out of hand. Last Friday i woke up with no voice whatsoever and it's been that way until today i woke up and i could slightly croak out a few words. sexy, i know. seriously though it has been rough. its my last week in NY until probably June and was not how i envisioned spending it. to be honest, i'm pretty depressed. my voice is my love and not having it feels almost paralyzing. Plus i'm just plain bored with sitting on the couch, steaming my throat, and eating honey til i'm nauseous. And the kicker is that it looks like i will have to cancel my show tomorrow at piano's. i'm still hoping i wake up tomorrow well, but its unlikely. that's all for now. tiff

Sports Illustrated Video from Fashion Week

2008-04-04T20:32:00.000-07:00

They used "All I wanna Do Is Love". cute ;)

What is it about the rain?

2008-03-19T21:29:00.000-07:00

;) It is a gorgeous night here in NY. Just left Rose's in Williamsburg. Tonight is just the right kind of cold and there is nothing quite like a walk home in the rain. It's nights like this when I realize how madly in love with NY I am. How many places in the world can you just wander into an empty bar in brooklyn on a rainy wednesday at midnight and see a lovely jazz trio playing for pennies just to share their music? Absolutely stunning.. Spending time in LA has me appreciate it more and more. It's so easy when I am in NY full time to get into a routine and forget all the things that I came here in the first place: museums, jazz, art and of course romance. To be here with an intention to experience everything and everyone fully is a completely different world. Love Love Love NY.

Mercury Lounge

2008-03-15T21:57:00.000-07:00

was out of control. thank you all for being so damn sexy

Hotel Cafe

2008-03-03T21:59:00.000-08:00

thank you all for coming. i wore my special pink cupcake dress for you. fyi: i am madly in love with my bandmates: Brendan Buckley, Joe Carnes and of course Master Ben Peeler. I am also enamored with a fellow and songwriter that you should all check out: myspace.com/thebrendanhines Lastly wish my dear one Mikki James a happy bday myspace.com/mikkijamestheband and my bud Pesci as well.

xot

A Rainy Day in LA. Plus Hotel Cafe and Mercury Lounge show info.

2008-02-23T19:31:00.000-08:00

Today I sat on the docks in Hermosa Beach watching pelicans and a pod of Dolphins in the rain. It was stunning. One of those moments where I was so present to the unexpected - And to how beautiful and peaceful the unknown can be. With that said I would love to invite you all to be with me at my last show in LA before I leap over to NY for a homecoming at The Merc.

Wed 2/27 @ 7pm. The Hotel Cafe. 1623 1/2 N. Cahuenga Blvd., Los Angeles. w/Ben Peeler, Joe Carnes, Brendan Buckley
Fri 3/14 @ 830pm. The Mercury Lounge. Houston @ Essex. New York City w/The MF's. (also Les Sans Culottes & Elk City)

Look forward to seeing you all. Oh - also - if you get a moment, will you review the EP on Itunes?

Thanks!!! xoTiff

freedom.love.play
www.tiffanyrandol.com
www.myspace.com/tiffanyrandol

Valentine's Day

2008-02-15T19:32:00.000-08:00

This was my first Valentine's Day being single. and.... well - it rocked... My godmother Anita took me for a manicure and pedicure. We ate sushi. (I drank sake). Then she took me shopping and gave me some V-Day bling. Exhausted, we came home and watched a chick flick. ;) lol. Could it have been any more perfect? don't think so! Cheers to being single. This is such a strange experience for me and i must admit i am enjoying it. kiss

a day in la

2008-02-06T19:05:00.000-08:00

Realized I stopped blogging for a while and i apologize. What happens is i get so overwhelmed with the amount of things happening, that i don't even know where to begin OR option 2, there are so many scandalous things better left unsaid ;) SO then i just avoid talking about it all together.

Started the day making a vision board. I've never done one, but oprah says its a must and it was actually kind of fun. Then spent the afternoon with a new friend, Charlie Mars who I met at last Monday's Hunnypot Radio Party. Was great to see everyone.. Charlie is a great songwriter - charliemars.com - listened to his new record which has a song that I fell in love with about listening to Dark Side of the Moon. very charming.. We went to check out Jim Scott's studio today which was basically like a big kid toybox.. i was kind of salivating. Lots of little toy piano's and colorful tapestries - Elvis paraphenalia - pure heaven. Going to the Donna's tonight at Crash Mansion in LA.

Ooh La La

2008-02-03T19:04:00.000-08:00

Out in LA now! It's been such a fun week! Played a great show with the MF's at the Knit for the Limewire party. I feel like we hit a nice stride musically and of course as usual had a love fest that went late into the night. Then Greg and I drove out Wed night to Northampton, which is such a cute town.. We played for the gorgeous gals at Smith College and than rocked Guitar Hero all night at the Talbot House. It looks like we will probably be back in the spring again as well! Flew into LA friday - i think i travelled at least 12 hours... Lots of delays, a stopover in N. Carolina and when i got to LA I found out my luggage was left in N. Carolina! Yep - one of those ;) But now I'm here, it's beautiful weather, and i'm so excited!! Yesterday I got to drive my dream van around redondo beach. I will post pix on my blog this week!

Tonight I'm playing Tangier with my good friend and songwriting partner Ari Shine. www.arishine.com We're pretty excited to do our first duo performance - playing eachother's songs and songs we've co written. should be a fun show! Next week playing with the band at Silverlake! I'll try to send an update every week on how things are going! Love, Tiff

---------------
Here are the upcoming dates:

2/3/08 @ 8pm. Tangier w/ Alex and Sam and Ari Shine. $10
2138 Hillhurst Avenue. Los Angeles, CA

2/11/08 @ 9pm. Silverlake Lounge. Full Band Show w/ Robert Francis.
2906 Sunset Blvd. Los Angeles, CA

2/17 @ 10pm. Room 5. Acoustic Show
143 North La Brea 2nd Fl., Los Angeles, CA

2/27 @ 7pm. Hotel Cafe w/Full Band.
1623 1/2 N. Cahuenga Blvd., Los Angeles, CA

NYC/MA/LosAngeles

2008-01-28T08:49:00.000-08:00

Hello love birds,

Frantically trying to get ready to head out to LA! Of course I will miss you all, but am thrilled to say I will be frolicking on the sunny West Coast ;) I have some amazing shows lined up (if you are out West and interested in booking me for an event or private performance, please let me know). Then in March I head back to NY to record an album w/Valeze. Check out www.tiffanyrandol.com I've now got a video link on the site that plays two Live videos that I filmed on FOX Fearless Music.

Tonight is my Cali Kick Off party!! Please join! It's a free Limewire event that starts at 730. I play with the MF's at 9pm. We get hardcopies of the EP in today, so I will have copies for you all, as well as a new line of tshirts and other goodies. Thursday I play with Greg McMullen on pedal steel at SMITH COLLEGE in Northampton, MA. Then fly out to LA and begin a stint of weekly shows out West starting with Tangier on 2/3 with Ari Shine and Alex and Sam.

I am also playing a game to create 1500 downloads on Itunes by Feb 15. How can you help? Download the EP on Itunes, call 10 friends and ask them to download it, and send out an email blast to all your people! If you want to be on the team to help this happen, please email me and let me know. Word of mouth is everything at this stage in the game and I thank you all for your unending support and love! xo Tiff

Tour Dates as follows:

* 1/28 @ 9pm Knitting Factory Tap Room. Tiff Randol and the MF's. Free Event from LIMEWIRE. 74 Leonard St. NYC.
* 1/31/08 @ 9pm Smith College Goldstein Lounge, Northampton MA
* 2/3/08 Tangier 2138 Hillhurst Avenue. Los Angeles, CA w/ Alex and Sam and Ari Shine. $10
* 2/11/08 @ 9pm Silverlake Lounge 2906 Sunset Blvd. Los Angeles, CA w/ Robert Francis
* 2/17 @ 10pm Room 5, 143 North La Brea 2nd Fl., Los Angeles, CA
* 2/27 @ 7pm Hotel Cafe, 1623 1/2 N. Cahuenga Blvd., Los Angeles, CA

----------------

Kiss Me Kiss Me, a 5 song EP produced, written, and engineered by Tiffany Randol "is a breathlessly intimate sketch on unconditional love that's drawn comparisons to June Carter, Kate Bush and the sun-drenched harmonies of Lennon and McCartney.”
- Matt Allen, MOJO Magazine

Download "KISS ME KISS ME" on Itunes!!!! www.tiffanyrandol.com myspace/tiffanyrandol

The Master Game

2007-11-27T12:02:00.001-08:00

The Master Game
By Robert S. DeRopp

Seek, above all, for a game worth playing. Such is the advice of the oracle to modern man. Having found a game, play it with intensity – play as if your life and sanity depended on it. (They do depend on it.) Follow the example of the French existentialists and flourish a banner bearing the word, ‘engagement.’ Though nothing means anything and all roads are marked ‘no exit,’ yet move as if your movements had some purpose. If life does not seem to offer a game worth playing, then invent one. For it must be clear, even to the most clouded intelligence, that any game is better than no game.

But although it is sage to play the Master Game, this has not served to make it popular. It still remains the most demanding and difficult of games and in our society, there are few who play. Contemporary man, hypnotized by the glitter of his own gadgets, has little contact with his inner world, concerns himself with outer, not inner, space. But the Master Game is played entirely in the inner world, a vast and complex territory about which men know very little. The aim of the game is true awakening, full development of the powers latent in man. The game can be played only by people whose observations of themselves and others have led them to a certain conclusion, namely, that man’s ordinary state of consciousness of which he is capable. In fact, this state is so far from real awakening that it could appropriately be called a form of somnambulism, a condition of ‘waking sleep.’

Once a person has reached this conclusion, he is no longer able to sleep comfortably. A new appetite develops within him, the hunger for real awakening, for full consciousness. He realizes that he sees, hears, and knows only a tiny fraction of what he could see, hear and know, that he lives in the poorest, shabbiest of the rooms in his inner dwelling, and that he could enter other rooms, beautiful and filled with treasures, the windows of which look out on eternity and infinity.

The solitary player lives today in a culture that is more or less totally opposed to the aims he has set himself, that does not recognize the existence of the Master Game, and regards players of the game as queer or slightly mad. The player thus confronts great opposition from the culture in which he lives and must strive with forces which tend to bring his game to a halt before it has even started. Only by finding a teacher and becoming part of the group of pupils that the teacher has collected about him can the player find encouragement and support. Otherwise, he simply forgets his aim, or wanders off down some side road and loses himself.

Here it is sufficient to say that the Master Game can NEVER be made easy to play. It demands all that a man has, all his feeling, all his thought, his entire resources, physical and spiritual. If he tries to play it in a halfhearted way or tries to get results by unlawful mean, he runs the risk of destroying his own potential. For this reason, it is better not to embark on the game at all than to play it halfheartedly.

BK HOUSE PARTY!!!

2007-11-12T11:18:00.000-08:00

Back from LA and Denver!!! My trip was amazing.. I met some incredible people, wrote with some amazing songwriters - Ben Peeler and Martyn LeNoble, played with my West Coast Boys - beans, ben and daniel pearson ;) Was really a great trip and I am anxious to head back out in February! Denver was gorgeous. I visited Garden of the Gods and did a seminar called Team management leadership program - which blew my mind.

Saturday was a scorpio bday celebration and mine as well ;) The MF's and I played a lovely set and met a bunch of fantastic brooklynites. Was a killer party - thanks bruno, dennis, katy and everyone who hosted and came out.

Here are a few pix: http://www.flickr.com/photos/tetheredtothemoon/sets/72157603113638014/

xo tiff

thinking stuff

2007-10-16T09:48:00.000-07:00

Reading this book now and thought i'd share:

"There is a thinking stuff from which all things are made, and which, in its original state, permeates, penetrates, and fills the interspaces of the universe.

A thought in this substance produces the thing that is imaged by the thought.

A person can form things in his thought, and by impressing his thought upon formless substance, can cause the thing he thinks about to be created."

-from The Science of Getting Rich

Review of Mo's Pitkins Show

2007-07-16T08:09:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone, I just wanted to thank all of you who were there last tuesday.. It was such a fantastic night - we all had such an amazing night. Love you all. Hope to see you Aug 7 at the next one. here's a review of the show last week from Limewire:

"During her sold out show last night at Mo Pitkins, singer songwriter Tiffany Randol introduced a packed audience to songs from her upcoming album, Sammasati. The spunky redhead took the stage of the lower east side lounge at 9 pm, and opened with her powerful piano-based tune, “Kiss Me, Kiss Me.”

Randol bounced around from a grand piano, an acoustic guitar, a decade-old synthesizer and a pair of spoons (which were generously lent to her by a waitress) as she passionately performed her diverse, upbeat set. Her unique blend of sweet and soulful vocals was clearly displayed as she gently flowed through her ten songs. Randol got the crowd involved during her chipper ho-down tune, “One 4 Me,” when she asked them to drum along to the beat by banging beer bottles together - - luckily, there was plenty of beer flowing throughout the night. Her final song, “Half a Second,” overflowed with powerful soul and rhythm melodies that filled the room with tickling goosebumps.

To hear some tracks off Sammasati, check out Tiffany’s myspace page. She will be performing at Mo Pitkins again on August 7th.

show at Mo Pitkins 7/10 @ 9pm

2007-07-03T08:59:00.000-07:00

It is my absolute delight to have an opportunity to celebrate the finishing of my record next Tuesday! It's called "Sammasati" and you can hear a few of the songs on MYSPACE. (link www.myspace.com/tiffanyrandol) I am so excited to be playing these songs life with some of my dearest and most talented friends. Please be there to help us break in the songs! I want you in the front row humming along and banging bottles. ;)

details:
MO PITKINS (34 Ave A. NYC)
July 10, 9pm
(also Aug 7, 9pm)

fyi: This is not a "record release" party - thought the record is complete, its not "officially" out and about (though we may have a few copies available at the show).

Much love,
Tiffany

PS. THE SPACE is very much under way, even though I have not sent an email lately. We are organizing an event launch for August and will be updating you soon. I am looking for a business partner and for additional team members who have the passion and commitment to local songwriters to work with on moving the project forward. Please email me if you've got it.

"An artist cannot fail; it is a success to be one." -Charles Horton Cooley

www.tiffanyrandol.com
whoiamisfreedom.blogspot.com
www.valeze.net
www.thespacenyc.org

Songwriters Hall of Fame

2007-06-09T08:45:00.001-07:00

Its been quite a week for me. Last week I finished mastering the record with Nathan James at Jigsaw Sound, started rehearsing for my solo stuff, did prepro on a new Valeze song, got a new roommate and began reorganizing my life. I realized this week that I am a "hyper-organized micro manager". self diagnosed ;) Seriously - I am highly OCD about odd little things like alphabetizing all my records, color coding my closets, putting all my adaptors and cables in their special places - I separate everything into little piles and end up with a big mess to clean up at the end of every day b/c I get WAY too detailed. The weird thing is - my piles don't make sense to anyone but me. Really if you tried to figure out the order of piles, you'd never get it. and to be honest, I probably would have a pretty hard time explaining it to you as well. lol. In any case - workin on that ;) So yes, much of my week was spent obsessing over how to get organized, moving shit out of my apartment, throwing things away, & making new piles ;) I think the spring cleaning illness caught me this week.

Aside from that truly exciting piece of news - the rest of my week was amazing. Songwriters Hall of Fame had an event on Tuesday where they acknowledged a bunch of up and coming writers, including myself, Matt Kanelos, Jodi Shaw, Benji from Marwood, Wendy Starland, The Dramas, and a bunch of other writers. Jimmy Webb taught a master class at the event and we all got to ask him questions, so I asked if i could come up and play a song. teehee. i figured - you only get one chance to play a song for Jimmy Webb. Plus he said something along the lines of "nowadays no one writes songs with lots of chords" - so I played "Kiss me Kiss me" - which btw is up on myspace now - check it out.

Thursday was the SHOF Annual awards ceremony. Dolly Parton, Jackson browne, Little Anthony, Mark Cohn, John Legend - all these incredible artists performed on one stage in honor of some of my favorite songwriters of all time - Bobby Weinstein, Michael Masser, Dolly, Don Kirshner and Irving Burgie (who was so unbelievably adorable... he got the entire audience singing Day-O in this campfire like version of it... it was amazing) Seeing Dolly perform was one of the highlights of my life - she's so damn lovable.

Afterwards people were milling around and I got to meet just about everyone except Dolly. The after party was a little tricky to get into, but Mr. Tony Orlando snuck me in! lol. He is seriously the shit... One of the highlights of the night for me was hanging out with Bobby Weinstein, Tony O and Toni Wine and hearing them talk about songs that they had written over the years. These are songs that inspired me to be a songwriter - these are people who changed my life and truly played a part in creating who I am today.. It was incredible to be in the presence of so many inspired individuals... I am so grateful and fortunate to have had that opportunity. Love you all...

Life

2007-05-29T22:53:00.000-07:00

Life always throws curve balls: things you don't want to deal with, relationships you want to deny, people you wished you weren't attached to, those who doubt you, plans you made in your head, and expectations never fulfilled... This month I began to experience myself in a new way. I've begun to learn detachment, commitment, clarity and responsibility. It is bizarre - extremely surreal to me. I've kept very hush about my experiences to most because I haven't known how to express the shift I've gone through.. It's been scary, yet its been empowering. I have realized things about myself that aren't pretty, but they are giving me freedom in acknowledging them.

I have really begun to understand who I am and what I am committed to in life. As I've begun to commit to guidelines for my life, I've begun detaching from the things in my life that don't fit under that umbrella. It's been scary because the familiar has taken a backseat. Relationships are shifting from a place of attachment to a new realm based on my commitments. It is unchartered, scary and beautiful...

Life is a declaration and a way of being and I am grateful to know that it is possible to recreate myself and my life anytime I choose. Today, who I am is the possibility of FREEDOM, UNCONDITIONAL LOVE, EMPOWERMENT and ACCEPTANCE.

Much Love - Deliriously Tired,

Tiff

the space

2007-03-15T12:34:00.000-07:00

feeling overwhelmed b/c i haven't written for a while. i feel like there are a million updates and i don't know where to start. so i'll forget it all and go with it ;)

i've been in an interesting space. finished my solo record and waiting to mix it. we're writing and arranging for the next Valeze record - yes, a full album ;) i'm writing like crazy and working with as many people as possible. i'm also doing the SELP course at Landmark which is pretty amazing. Im creating a community project and starting to surprise myself b/c i'm actually learning to be organized - its shocking really ;)

one of the things that i wanted to do was to transform a huge apartment complex in NYC into solar power. i think it could be such a cool domino effect - everything in NY is such a fad...maybe someone will steal my idea b/c i went with something else that hits a lot closer to home for me.

im creating a space for a group of about 25 artists to collaborate together in. i am surrounded by some of the most talented people in the world, who inspire me to no end... And I see them constantly getting stopped from following their visions b/c of money or whatever.

In NY the story goes something like this: brilliant artists with no money trying to make a buck to pay their rent so they can live in NY and play music with other brilliant musicians who are just trying to make a buck to pay their rent. space is expensive and the only free place to hang out are bars/venues and well, its a cycle called: a lot of talk and no action. Its a waste of energy and raw talent to see inspiration get tossed aside for "some day". There is no some day - You are either doing it or you're not.

So I got to thinking how amazing it would be if there was an actual space for us to hang and make music together in - like The Factory or something.. so that's what i'm up to. A lot of great people are starting to get involved and help make it happen. we're building an incredible team. pretty wild shit.

If anyone has ideas or wants to help - let me know!

xoxo t

ps. i finally watched The Secret yesterday. they did it real well... very powerful shit.

“Life is too short to be little”

2007-02-04T13:13:00.000-08:00

I just read this quote and thought it was pretty hot. Say hello and goodbye to bullshit ;)

“Life is too short to be little” - Disraeli.

"Often we allow ourselves to be upset by small things we should despise and forget. We lose many irreplaceable hours brooding over grievances that, in a year’s time, will be forgotten by us and by everybody. No, let us devote our life to worthwhile actions and feelings, to great thoughts, real affections and enduring undertakings."

--André. Maurois

Cockroaches and HIRO Ballroom

2007-02-01T10:33:00.000-08:00

i saw two cockroaches having sex in my kitchen this morning. a shocking thing to wake up to. the woes of living in NYC... thought i'd share ;) lol.

getting ready for the show tonight - doing vocal warmups and all that good stuff. very excited to play HIRO Ballroom - we're playing with Free Blood (!!!'s new side project), Sugar Report and DJs Ruff Kids and Alex English. Should be a fun night.

its been such an amazing couple of weeks. i wrote this song a couple of weeks ago and produced it in a couple of days in my home studio. never intended to have another song on my record, but its goin on ;) i love it... its incredibly silly. i got my yamaha pss 270 fixed and it has the most amazingly shitty sounds. to die for...

anywayz - the interview i did with Mens Fitness Mag went up yesterday:
http://www.mensfitness.com/rock_band_valeze/exclusives/156

and i found these photos from the jello wrestling gig we played in Dec. hilarious..

Stage Dive into the pit went something like this:

Fearless Music Video

2007-01-30T06:43:00.002-08:00

Check out our live performance of Go Go Go on Fox's Fearless Music TV Show.

http://www.fearlessmusic.tv/videos/ValezeGoGo.mov

Btw, last friday Formika's bday party was amazing. Incredible performances and I was absolutely blissful at getting to meet Debbie Harry. She is so incredible ;) sigh

My experience with the NY "Justice" Department

2007-01-19T06:31:00.000-08:00

Yes I spent the night in jail - for a suspended license... really - not kidding... 20 hours on a cold metal bench with stale cheese sandwiches - just me with my naughty invalid license and a bunch of crack dealers. Good things these cops are cracking down on all these "bad" people... Truly laughable (if you're not the one in jail).

Got pulled over for uturn without lights and i had a suspended license in NY from a ticket i got in high school, which i didn't even know about it... They could have easily told me to pay the old ticket the next day, but instead decided to cuff me and throw me in jail...

If you want to know what its like in a NY Jail cell - rent a video or read about it... really... i've always wondered what jail was like - well, there is nothing exciting about it. They stick you in a big cell with as many other people as they're holding. I guess I got lucky b/c there were only 7 people in my cell at a time. Apparently before i got there the cell was packed with people sleeping on the floor wall to wall. The room was freezing and the metal bench cold and hard. You would assume that you would be seen quicker or put in a less hostile situation if you were a first time offender or in for something stupid like i was... but it doesn't matter why you're there, they don't care.

Basically the way it works: it doesn't matter what you are in for: license or murder. If you jump a subway turnstyle, you could be locked in a cell for up to 72 hours with a murderer and there is NOTHING anyone can do to help you out. You don't get seen by the court until your paperwork is processed which generally takes 18-24 hours. and they love to take their time. (sarcasm): Fortunately for repeat offenders, anyone with a previous record is in the system already - so they get out quicker. I wasn't in the system so it took way longer to get me out b/c they had to find information on me. makes sense no?

My Day:

I got in there after breakfast was served - cornflakes and warm milk - which had been ravaged and scattered all over the room... Meals are served three times a day. breakfast at 430am. lunch at 10ish: stale bread with mayo and either a slice of velveeta cheese or the nastiest peanut butter you've ever seen. and warm milk. dinner at 6: same cheese/pb deal and of course, warm milk.

The bathroom was in the holding cell, so you literally had to use it with an audience. Not to mention there were roaches in the toilet... Luckily this holding cell had a phone in it so i could call my family and any other numbers i had memorized. if i wouldn't have had any numbers memorized i would have been screwed.

My cellmates: There was one other girl in there with me who was in for the same as me, a chinese massage parlor girl, a couple crack dealers, heroin and meth addicts. One woman was going through withdrawal pretty heavily. i felt so awful for her... She was in so much pain - she just layed there moaning and crying for xanax or anything to make the pain stop... They eventually gave her a xanax, which quieted her down for a short time.

my head was splitting and i was exhausted - add on top of that cell doors slamming, people yelling and this woman coming down for hours and hours. The first twelve hours i was so upset, exhausted and sick, so i pretty much kept to myself - attempted to sleep on the bench, tried to stay warm. My mind had plenty of time to go crazy...

Then something interesting happened: i got to this point where i realized, it was what it was... there was nothing I could do. i had no control and there was nothing anyone could do to get me out. for those of you that know anything about me: you know i am a control freak through and through. to not be in control is something that scares me more than anything. well... i had 20 hours to sit with the fact that I HAD NO CONTROL. those were my circumstances and those people in the room with me were all i had... So I started talking to them and a funny thing happened - it started feeling like a hellish, yet humorous slumber party. everybody was telling their life stories. how they got to where they got. they all had families that they loved. most of them had children. one woman had a four year old son - she got on a meth program to get off heroin, but now is hooked on meth. She desperately wanted to get off... We talked about this program (ACI i think?) where you can actually detox and take opiate blockers (which keeps you from getting high: check out the book "BUZZED" for more info - an amazing book i just finished) she seemed so hopeful when we mentioned this program... she talked about her dreams of getting clean so she could work and take care of her son.

another woman, 45, had been on heroin since she was 18, had 5 kids and lives in a shelter with her husband. what a sweet woman - so kind and caring to everyone in the room - she called herself the "cell mom". ;) her life story was fascinating... i asked her if she was at all curious about what it might be like to be clean after a lifetime of addiction and she said: yes and no.. she loves the way heroin makes her feel blissful and peaceful, but doesn't like the side effects of being unproductive, non-sexual, unhealthy and the hardest thing is that when she's high, she doesn't care about anyone or anything else. She said to me "I sometimes have this feeling that the dope is keeping me almost alienated from the people I love". It broke my heart. She was such a sweet woman.

The stories went on and on. We talked for hours and later that evening after "dinner", they brought in two male inmates to clean the cell. It was the strangest thing! We all became completely silent and watched as one of them swept the cell clean. I started laughing and everyone joined in - it was like this man swept out all of our fears for a moment. We all joked with him about how he had made our day and none of us wanted to let him leave - we were desperate for entertainment. So we kept finding new spots to sweep for him ;) lol. eventually he got shoo'd out and the guy with the mop came in. When they finished, we all took a deep breath and talked about how clean we all felt. At the moment, it was almost as good as taking a shower - brilliant. One of those moments of clarity that I'll never forget.

It was one of the saddest days of my life. To sit like that, face my fear of losing control, and to watch that madness reflected in the lives of these people. It didn't matter what we were there for, what our stories were, what our addictions were - we were all the same: trying to escape from ourselves. With none of life's usual distractions and lots of time to kill, I was definitely forced to sit with myself and my fears and it was interesting and not an easy thing to do.

I'm still working through my feelings with all of this. I don't know where I am at the moment. Still dealing with it. I'm so angry at the concept of the NY "JUSTICE" Department. It seems like our city is run by power hungry fools who care about nothing but numbers. The system is a SCAM - a fraud. It has nothing to do with justice and everything to do with money. They pick these "criminals" up off the streets, put them in a cell, fine them, take their money, and put them back out on the street so that they can do the same thing all over again the next day. There is no integrity in this system... This poor woman on Meth: they put her in jail, let her go through a painful withdrawal, fined her and then put her right back out. How does this help her!?!? They don't care. She's just another unfortunate, sick person that they use and take advantage of to make money for the city. Whatever that is, it not "Just".

After having this experience, it changed my perspective in many ways... As much as I don't wish the experience on anyone, I do think that it is the responsibility of our politicians and "representatives" to know what it is they are standing for. A day in NYC's "tombs" will give anyone a real taste of what the city is about from the ground up.

The way I see it - if you choose to stand for something, represent something - you better damn well have lived or experienced what you are representing, otherwise you are simply inauthentic, a fraud. People don't trust politicians b/c they rarely get their hands dirty (in public anyway;). A politicians job is to represent their city/state/country - to represent their People! So they should know what they represent by their own experience, not bullshit handshakes and evaluation charts.

They should know what it feels like to sit on a cold metal bench with murders and crack dealers for 24 hours - to have nothing but warm milk and indigestion sandwiches - to take a piss in a cockroach infested toilet with an audience of criminals. and most important, what it feels like to have no control: to just have to sit and wait it out for a full 24 hours. Again, I am not saying this because I wish them ill - only to be aware of the ground they stand on. It is their duty to know how ALL people are being treated. Politicians think they are aware because they have poked their heads into a jail cell, seen what it looks like. Wake up! Being a spectator never won any game. They only way to know where we stand is to experience the ground we stand on.

An Inconvenient Truth

2006-12-24T21:15:00.000-08:00

Xmas Eve and I am in PA with my family. Never had a Xmas so warm... Absolutely bizarre... It doesn't even feel like the holiday to me. I am just so used to cold weather and at least a flurry. It's nice to be here though and get some fresh air, plus tonight there was a crescent moon - it was gorgeous...

I watched Al Gore's film "An Inconvenient Truth" tonight. Was absolutely astonishing... They did such an incredible job with the film. I had no idea it would be so powerful and inspiring...

Last week I felt so powerless about everything that is happening with the environment. The intellectual, motivating part of me was saying "you can make a difference, go for it!" and this other part was saying - "nothing you do will matter, we're all fucked". and honestly i was so overwhelmed... like so often, both feet were on opposite sides of the fence and i was caught somewhere in the middle - thinking and thinking.

someone said to me "you know what you get with thinking??
-a lot of thoughts" ;)

So perfect and so typical. How often do I sit around thinking about what i could be doing and getting overwhelmed and flustered b/c - jesus..... there's just too much to do and i can't do everything at once!!! and then i get frustrated and put it on the backburner and then my shoulders grow another knot. its absurd ;)

Someone I love inspired me tonight with a bulletin on all the little things we can be doing to make a difference with global warming. We don't realize just how huge of an impact these little things make - but they do. Watch "An Inconvenient Truth" - you will be astonished at the dramatic difference it will make if we all take on the willingness and committment to make a minor shift in the way we live day to day.

www.climatecrisis.net
print this out and put it on your fridge so you remember every day:

Things YOU CAN DO to lessen the effects of CO2 / Global Warming---------------------------------------------------------------

30 steps to save our planet!

REDUCE YOUR IMPACT AT HOME

Most emissions from homes are from the fossil fuels burned to generate electricity and heat. By using energy more efficiently at home, you can reduce your emissions and lower your energy bills by more than 30%.

In addition, since agriculture is responsible for about a fifth of the world’s greenhouse gas emissions, you can reduce your emissions simply by watching what you eat.

Here’s how:

1) Replace a regular incandescent light bulb with a compact fluorescent light bulb (cfl)

"CFLs use 60% less energy than a regular bulb. This simple switch will save about 300 pounds of carbon dioxide a year. If every family in the U.S. made the switch, we’d reduce carbon dioxide by more than 90 billion pounds! You can purchase CFLs online from the Energy Federation."

2) Move your thermostat down 2° in winter and up 2° in summer.

"Almost half of the energy we use in our homes goes to heating and cooling. You could save about 2,000 pounds of carbon dioxide a year with this simple adjustment. The American Council for an Energy Efficient Economy has more tips for saving energy on heating and cooling."

3) Clean or replace filters on your furnace and air conditioner

"Cleaning a dirty air filter can save 350 pounds of carbon dioxide a year."

4) Install a programmable thermostat

"Programmable thermostats will automatically lower the heat or air conditioning at night and raise them again in the morning. They can save you $100 a year on your energy bill."

5) Choose energy efficient appliances when making new purchases

"Look for the Energy Star label on new appliances to choose the most efficient models. If each household in the U.S. replaced its existing appliances with the most efficient models available, we’d eliminate 175 million tons of carbon dioxide emissions every year!"

6) Wrap your water heater in an insulation blanket

"You’ll save 1,000 pounds of carbon dioxide a year with this simple action. You can save another 550 pounds per year by setting the thermostat no higher than 120 degrees Fahrenheit."

7) Use less hot water

"It takes a lot of energy to heat water. You can use less hot water by installing a low flow showerhead (350 pounds of carbon dioxide saved per year) and washing your clothes in cold or warm water (500 pounds saved per year) instead of hot."

8) Use a clothesline instead of a dryer whenever possible

"You can save 700 pounds of carbon dioxide when you air dry your clothes for 6 months out of the year."

9) Turn off electronic devices you’re not using

"Simply turning off your television, DVD player, stereo, and computer when you’re not using them will save you thousands of pounds of carbon dioxide a year."

10) Unplug electronics from the wall when you’re not using them

"Even when turned off, things like hairdryers, cell phone chargers and televisions use energy. In fact, the energy used to keep display clocks lit and memory chips working accounts for 5 percent of total domestic energy consumption and spews 18 million tons of carbon into the atmosphere every year!"

11) Only run your dishwasher when there’s a full load and use the energy-saving setting

"You can save 100 pounds of carbon dioxide per year."

12) Insulate and weatherize your home

"Properly insulating your walls and ceilings can save 25% of your home heating bill and 2,000 pounds of carbon dioxide a year. Caulking and weather-stripping can save another 1,700 pounds per year. The Consumer Federation of America has more information on how to better insulate your home."

13) Be sure you’re recycling at home

"You can save 2,400 pounds of carbon dioxide a year by recycling half of the waste your household generates. Earth 911 can help you find recycling resources in your area."

14) Buy recycled paper products

"It takes less 70 to 90% less energy to make recycled paper and it prevents the loss of forests worldwide."

15) Plant a tree

"A single tree will absorb one ton of carbon dioxide over its lifetime. Shade provided by trees can also reduce your air conditioning bill by 10 to 15%. The Arbor Day Foundation has information on planting and provides trees you can plant with membership."

16) Get a home energy audit

"Many utilities offer free home energy audits to find where your home is poorly insulated or energy inefficient. You can save up to 30% off your energy bill and 1,000 pounds of carbon dioxide a year. Energy Star can help you find an energy specialist."

17) Switch to green power

"In many areas, you can switch to energy generated by clean, renewable sources such as wind and solar. The Green Power Network is a good place to start to figure out what’s available in your area."

18) Buy locally grown and produced foods

"The average meal in the United States travels 1,200 miles from the farm to your plate. Buying locally will save fuel and keep money in your community."

19) Buy fresh foods instead of frozen

"Frozen food uses 10 times more energy to produce."

20) Seek out and support local farmers markets

"They reduce the amount of energy required to grow and transport the food to you by one fifth. You can find a farmer’s market in your area at the USDA website."

21) Buy organic foods as much as possible

"Organic soils capture and store carbon dioxide at much higher levels than soils from conventional farms. If we grew all of our corn and soybeans organically, we’d remove 580 billion pounds of carbon dioxide from the atmosphere!"

22) Avoid heavily packaged products

"You can save 1,200 pounds of carbon dioxide if you cut down your garbage by 10%."

23) Eat less meat

"Methane is the second most significant greenhouse gas and cows are one of the greatest methane emitters. Their grassy diet and multiple stomachs cause them to produce methane, which they exhale with every breath."

REDUCE YOUR IMPACT WHILE ON THE MOVE

Almost one third of the carbon dioxide produced in the United States comes from our cars, trucks and airplanes. Here are some simple, practical things you can do to reduce the amount of carbon dioxide you produce while on the move.

Reduce the number of miles you drive by walking, biking, carpooling or taking mass transit wherever possible
Avoiding just 10 miles of driving every week would eliminate about 500 pounds of carbon dioxide emissions a year! Click here to find transit options in your area.

24) Start a carpool with your coworkers or classmates

"Sharing a ride with someone just 2 days a week will reduce your carbon dioxide emissions by 1,590 pounds a year. eRideShare.com runs a free national service connecting commuters and travelers."

25) Keep your car tuned up

"Regular maintenance helps improve fuel efficiency and reduces emissions. When just 1% of car owners properly maintain their cars, nearly a billion pounds of carbon dioxide are kept out of the atmosphere."

26) Check your tires weekly to make sure they’re properly inflated

"Proper inflation can improve gas mileage by more than 3%. Since every gallon of gasoline saved keeps 20 pounds of carbon dioxide out of the atmosphere, every increase in fuel efficiency makes a difference!"

27) When it is time for a new car, choose a more fuel efficient vehicle

"You can save 3,000 pounds of carbon dioxide every year if your new car gets only 3 miles per gallon more than your current one. You can get up to 60 miles per gallon with a hybrid! You can find information on fuel efficiency here and here."

28) Try car sharing

"Need a car but don’t want to buy one? Community car sharing organizations provide access to a car and your membership fee covers gas, maintenance and insurance. Many companies – such as Flexcar -- offer low emission or hybrid cars too! Also, see ZipCar."

29) Try telecommuting from home

"Telecommuting can help you drastically reduce the number of miles you drive every week. For more information, check out the Telework Coalition."

30) Fly less

"Air travel produces large amounts of emissions so reducing how much you fly by even one or two trips a year can reduce your emissions significantly. You can also offset your air travel by investing in renewable energy projects."

Goto http://www.climatecrisis.net/takeaction/carboncalculator/

Take the quiz and repost your score. It is astonishing to see how much you contribute to polluting our planet. Once you see the results hopefully you will help by completing the steps above.

Collectively we can make a difference!

I miss Snow

2006-12-11T22:06:00.000-08:00

Tonight I was riding the L train on my way to a Landmark seminar - it hit me hard that it still had not snowed and before I could blink I was crying - I felt so sad. Growing up in upstate NY, it was always cold and the snow came hard and lasted a long time, but I loved it... The first snow was one of my favorite moments every year - I knew that sledding, fires, and hot chocolate were on the way. There's something so amazing about the winter. I think for me a big part of it is the chance to appreciate warmth... There's something incredible about freezing your ass off outside or on the ski slopes and the feeling you get when you step inside - your body is flushed - its almost like a rush, a natural high. and when you get inside, there is nothing like a fire and a hot drink - its perfect...

So I was on the train, thinking how sad it would be if one day there was no longer snow. And it seems like it is going in that direction. The weather is freaking me out... My friend Jesse told me that in 50 years if things don't change quick, we will no longer be able to eat seafood. http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1731305/posts

and that we are running out of fresh water even quicker.

I got off the train and stood outside Landmark for a while looking at the smoggy NY sky and the cement ground and felt so overwhelmed... I felt hopeless - like the world is dying and there's nothing i can do b/c i'm just one person in a world of people that seem so set on destroying themselves and everything around them. Everywhere I look, it seems that we just want to killkillkill. We kill ourselves, we kill the earth, we kill others, we kill our hopes. We are so busy trying to prove ourselves, trying to be right, trying to possess - being unconcious, and we leave no room for anything but destruction. The sad thing is that we make these decisions not b/c we are "Bad" or "Wrong" - we make them b/c we don't know any better, b/c we think we are right, b/c we are afraid... Bush, Bin Laden, You, Me - we're all the same... At the end of the day, we are just like them. We want to believe that we're different - that one is "Right" and the other is "Wrong"... But that only proves how we are the same. We live what we know. Guaranteed that what you think is right, someone else thinks is wrong. and what they think is right you think is wrong. Does that make you right? Does it make you wrong? or is it possible that right and wrong only exist in our heads? We all make decisions that we believe are right and those decision are based on what we know. Unfortunately, most of us know jack shit and tell ourselves that we know it all. That's why we fight. That's why we kill.

I went into the seminar not wanting to be there - i was just so sad... i wanted to crawl up in bed and cry or write a song, but i forced myself to go in. By the end of the class I realized that I was doing to myself exactly what I see us all doing in the world - I was killing myself off by being hopeless and small. It's so easy to feel overwhelmed and hopeless b/c the world is so big. It's so easy for me to go into my whole bullshit story - oh, I'm just some poor songwriter, not big enough to make a difference in the world, so why bother? That's what I say to myself when I'm looking for an easy out. It would be so much easier to just curl up on my couch and put on my headphones.. to give up.. but then what's the point of being alive? If I'm not out there making a difference, life is pointless.

The fact of the matter is - this is OUR world. If we don't all start to make a difference, start to change the way we treat the universe, if we don't create awareness for one another - we all fail. There is no "I" here... butterfly effect - karma - whatever you want to call it - we all live and die in this world together.

The universe will take care of itself - the cyclone in London, freak tsunamais and hurricanes, disease... Is it possible that WE are all responsible for these things that are happening? WE are causing these freak incidents. The way that we treat the environment - how wasteful we are - how unaware. I don't believe that any of us do it out of malice - we all have basic goodness - we treat the world the way we do b/c we don't know any better and/or b/c we are trying to protect OURselves. But it hit me tonight - we have to work together. All of us. Every single one... There is no "I" in the universe - only in our heads - and if we remain divided, things will be no different that they were yesterday. If there is one thing in our world that is universal - it is to learn how to take care of the universe. It doesn't matter who we are, where we come from - we all share the same world and its our responsibility to care for it and create awareness for others.

So I am starting to think about what I can do... I don't know exactly how it will show up yet, but it will.

I'm exhausted... I need to go sleep. I didn't go to sleep on Saturday and on Sunday we rehearsed all afternoon and then played this jello wrestling party ;) was a riot... I stage dived into the jello pit. freedom baby ;) too fun... thank you for reading this.. if you have anything inspiring to add, please share.. if you want to add facts about the environment, or even better - things we can do to help create awareness, etc - please share b/c it will benefit all of us...

love t

Update

2006-12-03T12:51:00.000-08:00

things have been kind of exploding in my life - all very exciting... i feel like i'm on a rollercoaster. this week has been pretty amazing - i did an interview with Men's Fitness Magazine, then wrote and recorded a piano score for my friend Brett Berg's new film. It's an independent short - very disturbing - borderline horror - weird shit. But it was so much fun - i've never scored a movie before and i was kind of nervous going into it b/c i had no idea whether i could do it right ;) lol. anyway - i went in and decided that writing horror music is too much fun. minor keys and tritones - my favorite ;)

so, i haven't really written about the solo record i'm recording b/c i've been afraid that people were going to think i was not dedicated to Valeze or something... but i realized that is ridiculous - i am so excited about this record and dying to talk about it... so fyi: i am more dedicated to Valeze than i ever have been - the guys are my family and i fucking looooove my band... However, music is my life and i'm an obsessive compulsive workaholic - now that that is cleared up...

I've been working on this record since August. i had all these songs that i love that don't fit Valeze. they're definitely softer. i've been compiling them for a while and just putting them on the backburner for "someday"... It hit me last June that i just needed to get them recorded and stop making excuses for not getting it done - ie. money... people thinking i wasn't dedicated to valeze... etc.. so i recorded some basic piano/voice demos of the songs and started looking for someone to produce the songs for me - then my next excuse - "its not possible for me to do it myself - i need someone else to produce it"... Then my next excuse - "i can't afford to work with these producers"... the cycle's never ends;)

my friend mikki james(also one of my favorite songwriters/bass players) was self producing his record all summer and it was pretty inspiring for me to watch him do it... last july i was asking him for advice on getting my record done and he said - "produce your own record - you know how to engineer and you have good songs. just do it..." i don't know what about that made it hit home - i've heard it before - but i guess the combination of admiration i have for him as an artist and watching him produce his record pushed me to it. i had this idea that my record had to be some big production that was impossible for me to do... then i realized i was just making it up and creating more excuses to not get it done. self sabotage... why do i love it so? ;) anyway - i decided that i had to just get it done...

ive had no plans for this record. no "vision" if you will. take that how you want to, but i think its pretty beautiful... there's been no plan - i started with the piano/voice demos and have added piece by piece - percussion, synths, electronic drums, beatboxing (yes i did, and no its not what you think it is...). i've never produced before, so i have no idea what im doing. i figured the music would just create itself and i'd be surprised at the end. it definitely feels very "free" - nothing is contrived in the least since i have no idea what's coming next! not that there's anything wrong with having a plan either - its just that its been really fun for me to do this record like this - very spontaneous.

i started getting a little more ambitious along the way and decided to stereo track live drums in our studio - which was a blast - miles tracked some of the drums, i played on a couple tracks as well - of course, not as good as miles ;) he's such a great drummer - banged them out in one take! i love the drum sound and love that its just a stereo track. (i'm a geek)... so the drums led to guitars, lap steel and it started to grow into something bigger than i thought it would. I've had some incredible friends record on this record and everyone who's been a part of it has really brought a piece of themselves to it. i keep finding myself surprised everytime something new is recorded - which makes it even more fun.

Two weeks ago i had spent the entire weekend recording bass with Mikki, who came in from CT, and trumpet with my friend Joe Bennett. As I was about to back up the record my hard drive crashed and i lost all the bass, trumpets, and a drum track.. thankfully i had backed everything else up - but regardless, it was a weeks worth of work and I felt awful that Mikki and Joe's work got destroyed... i was kind of a mess, but i realized i couldn't do anything except retrack and do it better than before. honestly it ended up being a blessing in disguise. Last weekend I re-recorded the bass in CT w/Mikki and it completely breathed new life into everything... Also rerecorded trumpets with Joe - they sound insane... we ended up doing some very "grand" trumpet arrangements, added some more lapsteel too. ;) and yesterday i tracked some guitars with my buddy RJ as well. gogogo

In any case, its finally coming to the final stages. Gotta go edit and track some more guitars so i can start recording vocals this week.

love,

tiff

oh - other great news - we got Valeze up on itunes this week - very excited about that as well. download it and show some love!

Choose/Decide-React/Respond

2006-12-02T13:27:00.000-08:00

Just read this Osho quote and thought it was amazing:

"The word "responsibility" has been continuously used in a wrong way. It gives a feeling of burden: you have to do it, it is a duty; if you don't do it you will feel guilty. I want to remind you that the word `responsibility' has none of those connotations. Break the word in two -- response-ability -- and you enter a totally different meaning of the word, in a different direction. Response-ability is not a burden. It is not a duty; it is not something you have to do in spite of yourself.

Response-ability simply means spontaneous response. Whatever situation arises, joyously you respond to it, with your totality, with your intensity. And this response will not only change the situation, it will also change you.

There are two words to be remembered: one is "reaction" and one is "response-ability." Most people react, they don't respond. Reaction comes from your memory, from your past experiences, from your knowledge; it is always inadequate in a fresh, new situation. And existence is continuously fresh. So if you act according to your past, that is reaction. But that reaction is not going to change the situation, it is not going to change you, and you will be in utter failure.

Response is moment-to-moment. It has nothing to do with memory, it has something to do with your awareness. You see the situation with clarity; you are clean, silent, serene. Out of this serenity, spontaneously you act. It is not reaction, it is action. You have never done it before, but the beauty of it is that it will suit the situation, and it will be a joy to you to know that you are capable of being spontaneous.

There are very few joys in life greater than spontaneity. Spontaneity means to be in the moment; it means acting out of your awareness, not acting according to your old conditionings. Those days are gone -- those conditions, conceptions are absolutely invalid." http://www.otoons.com/politics/osho_end_of_the_world.htm

I love Osho... I've been reading a bunch of his books (Check him out on Amazon - my fave is "Intimacy") He can come across as very extreme b/c of his use of language - he just loves to stir people up to think for themselves. One minute he says one thing, the next another - but he is always speaking from his heart.. I don't always agree with him, but most of what he has to say is incredibly powerful.

I was thinking about how often i say "yes" or "no" to things without even thinking why. I automatically say yes or no b/c of a past experience, instead of actually thinking about the options and possibilities first. I make decisions constantly instead of choices and I'm not even aware of it most of the time.

thought this was kind of amazing.. I've never even thought about the difference between using words like decision vs. a choice... But the distinction is so different... Deciding or Reacting is to do something based upon your past - you don't even Consider that there are other options when you decide and react... When you choose something its because you've considered all the possibilities and then responded to it... :

-----------
the word "decide" has the latin root -cide in it meaning "to kill"" Words ending in -cide come from the Latin verbal root of caedo, caedere, cecidi, caesum ("kill").

1. to solve or conclude (a question, controversy, or struggle) by giving victory to one side
2. to make a judgment or determine a preference; come to a conclusion.
------------
to Choose:
1.to select from a number of possibilities; pick by preference

------------

Just thought it was kind of fascinating... thought i'd share ;) some amazing stuff is happening... i will write about all of it soon..

who i am

2006-11-20T22:56:00.000-08:00

been avoiding baring my soul on cyberspace like the plague - here goes:

my entire life i have felt trapped. i wanted to be free - i wanted to express myself without having to constantly worry about what others would say. but it happened over and over again. everyone always has something to say ;) throughout my life everything i did seemed to be abnormal to people around me. all i wanted was to be myself and be accepted - but i constantly felt like an outcast. i have always had support and lots of love, but there was always those people that no matter what i did - i felt different and inside told myself they hated me for it.

so i have spent a lot of my life putting up walls to protect myself. i became righteous and said to everyone - fuck you and what you think - i don't care b/c i am who i am whether you like it or not and fuck you for judging me. everyone in my life... anytime anyone has said to me that they disagree with my choices i have told them to go fuck themselves time and time again b/c I WAS RIGHT and THEY WERE WRONG.

i thought this gave me courage and power, but what it did was destroy my trust with people... someone would disagree and deep down inside i felt like it was a personal attack on me - like they were trying to prove that who i was was wrong - so i'd shut them up and push them away pretending i was stronger than they were.

in August i GAVE UP BEING RIGHT. i never thought it was possible... but it hit me - i had never seen it before. i really got that NO two people on earth can possibly see things the same way and it doesn't mean anything when someone disagrees with me. they just disagree with me and it doesn't mean anything... not only did i realize that different perspectives are inevitable and valid (as opposed to a personal attack on me), but i also realized how much i can learn and be inspired by someone else's viewpoint... its amazing how much you can get from a viewpoint that is the polar opposite... the thing that's incredible is that everyone thinks that their viewpoint is right - me, you, everyone.. and you become so powerful when you can validate the most outrageous viewpoints. realizing this has changed my life b/c i see that right and wrong only exists in my imagination.

i realized that my entire DIY life has been something i've created to keep myself from needing help from anyone else. "i don't need anyone - i don't trust anyone - i'm doing it all myself b/c i can only count on one person - me". what has changed my life in the past couple of months was to realize how these ideas i created have pushed away people and opportunities in my life. yes, i have created many opportunities in my life by being driven to do things on my own instead of hoping someone else would do it for me and i am grateful that i know how to be driven - i will always be driven and always do things for myself. but it is not enough. one person cannot take on the world. we are all part of this world. we are all together in this whether we like it or not. and the only way we can be powerful is to see other people's perspectives and validate them no matter what the circumstance. that is how we can make a difference in the world - to appreciate one anothers differences.

who i am is freedom through self expression. we will never see eye to eye - its not physically possible for two people in the world to see the same perspective... i will tell you if i don't agree, but i will never make you wrong. i will never take away your freedom to be who you are, say what you feel and when you challenge me i will be grateful, even when it hurts.

i am nothing without the people in my life. i am a songwriter, i am a musician, i am an artist, i am many things - but none of means anything without you to share it with. without you i am nothing.

i tried to find freedom in music, dance, art, sex, love - i let go of my past and found it finally ;) the conception of Valeze was to encourage people to "check their baggage at the door", accept and love everyone for their differences, to feel safe expressing yourself as you are. inside i was still holding onto my baggage and couldn't give myself freely, but now i am truly free and entirely yours. thank you for being who you are and inspiring me to be who i am for you and for myself.